Hers: How do you say "WTF" In Portuguese? SP, Brazil

I wouldn't necessarily say that I treat my immune system with love and respect, but she has hung in there over the last 26 years of my existence and she very rarely let's me down.

We went out on the town pretty hard on Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday two weeks ago. On a scale of 1-10 (1 being just one cup of booze per night and 10 being ten cups of booze per night) we were keeping it at s consistent 5-7 cups each night. So, not bad. Monday morning we were only slightly hungover, which results in extra cuddles for me, so it's always totally worth it. 

We opened all of the windows in the apartment (friends from home can't do that no mas- brrrr brrr, it’s cold up thurr!) then Andrew ran out to grab us big sloppy breakfast sandos and coffee.  We successfully pushed through our ’slow wakeup’ and were feeling perfect by 9-10 AM. 

Six Pee Em rolls around and we're both incredibly light headed, nauseous, dizzy, could hardly keep our eyes open and our heads were absolutely pumping. What, the, heck?!

A cup of coffee, Makers Mark, Ketel one, OJ, Airborne, Excedrin, white wine, red wine, peppermint schnapps, etc. can always snap me out of basically any funk. Not this time. Nothing could shake this nasty sickness for either of us. I may or may not have tried several of the above at once and I was still a zombie. 

When all of the symptoms continued for TWO EFFING DAYS and the bloody noses arrived, we knew something was up. We were beyond out of it - all of our liveliness zapped, and waddling around like march of the penguins (also an appropriate joke because Andrew is white and black). On Wednesday morning, my body was achy from laying in the fetal position for so long, so I tried to go for a run to get some "fresh air.” A minute in I nearly passed out on the street. I walked on all fours up the hill to our apartment, went to bed and didn't get out of bed once until noon the next day. It was kind of brutal and unlike any other physical illness experience I've had before.  

Anyways, poor Andrew had to go to a meeting that day, so he fought through it and came back with interesting news. Andrew’s meeting mate apologized for how terrible he was feeling and that he could not meet for long. The last 3 days were really rough on him….(exactly like us!!!).  So Andrew shared our pain, and the gentleman informed him that his bad headaches and chronic dizziness was due to the SMOG!!! The smog levels in SP were near their highest ever, and since there has been a drought there for the last 6 months (oh yeah, FYI - Sao Paulo is operating at .06% water capacity — a result of the rampant deforestation of the AMAZON. WTF - pay attention to the environment or something you evil money-greedy pigs!), people are extra-susceptible to the airborne pollutants. SMOG. FREAKING SMOG was making us crazy! I did some research because I couldn't believe that some crappy air follicles could torture us to such extreme measures. Some folks at UC Berkeley claim the following, "While the effects of smog vary according to factors such as age, state of health, time of exposure, and dosage, the general symptoms include coughing, sneezing, headaches, tiredness, irritation, nausea, and hoarseness of the throat, nose, and eyes, and constrictions of the chest.” Ya, I can corroborate your story, Berkeley. College people are smaht (Boston accent).  

Moral of the story: 

Go get a smog check right now. If you don’t, I’ll hate you forever. Or just get rid of your car. Or buy a Tesla. 

This was a disturbing experience and really opened my eyes to what we're doing to this planet and how we're going to pay for it in many ways. Blah Blah Al Gore.  Listen to him, I think.

Hers: Victory

For those of you who don't know pre-trip Adrienne very well, she has a small obsession with high heels, cocktail dresses and bags. Just like most women, but pre-trip Adrienne very rarely wore the same outfit twice for admittedly vain reasons. 

So...I cried a little when Andrew broke the news that we were only bringing carry-on bags for this adventure of a lifetime. I thought we'd be bringing roller bags, like, big ones. I got more choked up when he suggested that we attempt to bring the clothing we would wear for a minimum of ~six months and THEN we could start trading pieces out for new items if our trip lasts longer. If you've read our website you'd know that part of the purpose of this trip was to learn how to live simply and shed ourselves of our high maintenance tendencies. I'm here to tell you that from experience, that drastic change of thinking doesn't happen over night, nor does it happen over 3 weeks! The only thing we really argued about while preparing for our trip was what I could put in his bags. I may or may not have had a few nights when I would lie awake at night frustrated and stressed about what I was going to pack. 

So, we were just in Rio for three weeks. Rio is a very casual, beach town. You might have read my last post called "Rio-ians" about Rio style. Simply put, its pretty hideous overall. I saw a couple of knock-off designer bags and I can count on my hands how many times someone was in heels. I was totally cool with my wardrobe not including anything nicer than tshirts, cut-off shorts, Birkenstock sandals and sneakers. I wasn't even upset about wearing the same outfits twice! 

After our time in careless, fashionably unguided Rio we're now in Sao Paulo. SP is known to be the NYC of South America, but bigger. We just happen to be staying in one of the nicest neighborhoods of the city too. 

You know what those factors add up to? Me, hating my contents of my backpack. My tshirts and birkies are no longer appropriate to be worn after the sun goes down here. I really just wanted to tell you that today, after only three weeks on the road, I am going shopping. Today!! (Insert: smiley face emoji, clappy hand emoji, dancing girl emoji, tears of joy emoji, girl with crown emoji, thumbs up emoji, sunglasses emoji and all of the monkey emojis) It’s sad that I’m so happy right now…someday, hopefully, I’ll be better.

His: So we've both started online dating in Rio, Brazil

Well not exactly, but kinda.  Each time we've met a local English speaker in Rio (which is rare) we have gotten such amazing tips and recommendations from them, that it's driving us to both learn more Portuguese and to seek out more English speakers everywhere we go.  We want the local experience, but it's ridiculous to ask every person we walk by if they speak English (can't take the face to face rejection).  So we took to the Internet! 

On Instagram, you get a chance to see so much about people, and interact with them naturally before ever asking them on a "date."  I can easily see that they speak English, what music they like, what they really care about and are interested in, if they're artistic/creative, if they're into fashion, what kind of work they do, are they social/partiers...and so on.  In theory, it's the perfect place to meet someone cool online, but don't get me wrong, you still feel like a creepy stalker.

So the thought is, we look at hashtags that we're interested in (#riostreetart, #riodejaneiro, #brazil, etc.) and we find really awesome people.  At least, people whose internet-lives look awesome.  Like their posts, comment, hope for reciprocal, then drop your best hang-out line.

RESULTS: Searched #riodejaneiro, saw an awesome, artsy shot, checked out more photos, and Adrienne and I agreed that we'd be friends with her. She lives in LA and is traveling in Rio. So we go back and forth commenting and I make the move - "Looks like you've found some cool things in Rio that @admcdermott and I would love!  You up for being a tour guide?" ....crickets, for a week now.  Apparently, over the course of 5 minutes, I left the internet-friend-zone and moved onto creeper status.  Crap, too forward, we should have known better!  You'd think that by putting both of our heads together to make friends with strangers that we'd be pretty good at it.  I want to post her @name here because I'm mad and want you to hate-comment on her stuff, but I won't....for now.

Can't let that rejection keep us down, c'mon team, you can do this!

Onto my next target.  This time, I "pursued" a guy from Brooklyn, runs a men's fashion site and he actually liked 2 of my posts first.  This should be like taking candy from a baby.

We like and comment back and forth about how cool the other is, I drop my comment about meeting up and patiently wait.... A few hours later, I got my first direct message!!!! Woot!  We went back and forth on how best to meet up, but he soon stopped responding.  I assume because he had to go to something extremely important like deliver a baby or save a house from burning down, because why else would he stop talking to me?  This guy was really interesting looking and would have been an awesome artsy friend for us, but again, crickets.  No luck.

Adrienne and I went out that night and took a break from Instadating.  Walking down the street in Lapa, I got a tap on my shoulder and a "hey!"  It was my Brooklyn guy, with his glorious beard and super-hip outfit.  He was with another really cool guy from NYC, we all chatted for 20 mins, exchanged info and planned to cross paths in the future!  Instasuccessful.  Turns out he was delivering a baby for some lady on the beach, so I accepted his apology for going dark on me. :)  See you on the road @thebowlernyc!

Next up, Adrienne tried it out.  Found a local; fluent english, really awesome photos.  She made her move...home run (obviously Adrienne looks way more approachable than I do with my creepy beard).  He gave us great tips on Rio and took us up on having a drink!  After an amazing tour & sunset at Sugarloaf, we met up with our (hopefully not a "Catfish") internet friend (Insta-friend?) for drinks at a locals bar in a neighborhood we hadn't visited.  Everything about this was nerve-racking, we were just hoping not to be kidnapped!  Well, Brunno was as advertised and took us out for one of our best nights in Rio!  We checked out the really awesome neighborhood that he lives in, Urca, walked along the bay with a beautiful view of the downtown skyline, randomly toured this amazing brand new French Design school, saw the ruins of this beautiful 100 year old casino, ate and drank with the locals while dodging cockroaches (baratas).  And now we're friends forever.  Thanks @brunopessoa!

Boom we're successful online daters.  

@admcdermott and @andrewRmcdermott are looking for local English speakers in every city that we visit, so Instagrammers listen up; we're not creeps. The beard is weird but please believe me, we are really fun and will spice up your life.  Please, please, please be friends with us and show us how amazing your city is!  And don't you dare Catfish us!

For you readers; if you want to make some like-minded friends at home or abroad, Instagram is actually genius. (Try it - we've since made friends with 2 couples that we plan to see in Buenos Aires!  I look forward to writing the posts about meeting them!)